Sunday, October 25, 2009

Just Kinda Blah....

Tonight I had an amazing dinner (tacos) with the husband, my kiddos, and my best friend. Who I am sure by now, you all know is Amy over at The Undomestic Army Wife . Anyway, we were hanging out chatting and what not and she hit me with this question.."When are we telling Megan that I am moving?"
BAMMMMMM.. Like a ton of bricks, there it is. The ugly side of the Army life rears it's ugly, ugly head. How do I tell my seven year old that the only other adult she is closest to (besides her daddy and I) is leaving? I can't. How is it that I can tell Megan that her daddy is going to Iraq......again, but I can't tell her that "Auntie Amy" is moving away? I think it is easier for me to tell Megan that her daddy is going to Iraq, because she knows it's his job. She knows that daddy is a soldier, and he protects her and everybody by doing his job. But how can I tell her that someone she loves sooooo much is moving away? She is a amazing little girl, and I am sure she will get it. I am just not looking forward to explaining it to her. My issue is (to be completely honest) that I can't explain it to her, because I have to explain it to myself first. I have to make myself understand that she is moving.
Now, I am not new to this whole Army thing. I have been doing it for eight years. I know about saying goodbye, I have done it a million times over. But this hurts. This hurts worse than saying goodbye to my parents when I moved to Germany. This hurts just as bad as saying goodbye to my husband when I put him on a bus for 12 to 15 months.
She is the closest person to me, besides my husband. She is the closest person to Megan besides her daddy and I. She is Madisyn's God mother. How the hell do you say goodbye to someone that instrumental in your life? I cried in front of her about it tonight. I didn't mean to, and I will try very hard to keep it from ever happenig again, but it just came. Like someone broke the dam, it came. And it sucked. I am over the moon excited for her. Germany is an amazing expierence that I feel everyone in the military should have. Her and her husband have been talking about Germany for as long as I have known them. Mat has been there before, and everytime him and I will get on a conversation about Germany, his face lights up like a kid at Christmas. I am excited that he gets to go back, and this time take my best friend along for the ride. I can't wait for her to expierence everything Germany has to offer, and then call me and tell me all about it.
We decided that she will tell Megan. She is gonna pick her up from school later this week , and talk to her about it. I know that this is in no way the end, that Amy will always be there for my kids and I. I wil always be there for her. In fact, I am gonna get my passport updated because I will be going to visit her at least once while she is there. And when there is an addition to their clan, I will be there for that too.
Psssh..she is my best friend. There is no way in hell I am gonna let a little thing like an ocean get int he way of that. LOL


  1. Found your blog today! :) Looking forward to reading more :)
    ~ Bethany

  2. Its not saying goodbye, its saying "Til next time!" You'll see her again. :) Don't cry!

  3. The best part in "good bye" is "hello again". Army wives have a way of not letting anything come between a good friendship.